Category Archives: funny

Down “Write” Funny – It Ain’t Easy Being Green

Yesterday, my lawn was green. And just like that, one snowfall equals the grand arrival of winter and Christmas and all the mud and crap we’d previously sludged through is now bright, shiny and new! The same can be said … Continue reading

Posted in author, Down Write Funny, funny, Goals, green, humor, Little Goals, motivation, newbie, publishers marketplace, publishing, river dancing, writing, yippity skippity | 3 Comments

SQUIRREL!!!

Thank you to Liz Steiner for sending this extremely-appropriate-for-me cartoon! Cartoon Credit: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

Posted in ADHD, Down Write Funny, funny, humor, Squirrel! | 6 Comments

Down “Write” Funny – The PT Perk

So my Gazelle Girl damaged one of her hooves. You may have heard about it on my Twitter feed during one of my many #proudmama braggart postings about my track/cross country scholarship-bound spawn. (I swear one of my little ingrates … Continue reading

Posted in #proudmama, Brainstormers, Down Write Funny, funny, gestation, humor, illness, labor, marching band, Muscle Memory, NaNoWriMo, parenting, spawn, Squirrel!, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

The Iron Uterus – Introduction

*Author’s note: The Iron Uterus is a defunct blog I briefly began and then abandoned in its infancy. I’d like to restart it here to address the ‘mother’ part of my blog. Reader beware – these posts involve the rearing … Continue reading

Posted in alter ego, blue balls, conversion van, country, econoline, farm, Ford, funny, gestation, humor, Iron Uterus, labor, man-sack, minivan, nascar, parenting, spawn, truck, truck balls, wisconsin | 2 Comments

Down “Write” Funny – Elvis Isn’t The Only Character in Vegas

We recently vacationed to Vegas with another couple. Young Elvis took the flight over with us. Our first Elvis sighting. Our friends had never been to Vegas, so I’d eagerly been preparing them to see Elvis in all his headlining incarnations, … Continue reading

Posted in ass-finger, backstory, Characterization, Characters, Down Write Funny, Elvis, funny, Halloween, humor, spawn, writing | 6 Comments

Down “Write” Funny – Why I Suck

Yup. You heard that right. I suck. Big ol’ Dyson-destroying-Hoover robo-vacuum-beat-down suckage of epic proportions. Why, Betsy, why! Because I opened my gigantic maw and got everyone riled up about NaNoWriMo and do the math and write every day you … Continue reading

Posted in Down Write Funny, funny, Goals, humor, NaNoWriMo, Squirrel!, Suck, writing | 2 Comments

Down “Write” Funny – NaNoWriMo Land Part 2

So!  Yesterday, at the stroke of midnight, did you scribble the thoughts ricocheting off your gray matter and rampageously vomit up a few thousand words because the fire to write your story burned feral through your fingertips?? Did you make … Continue reading

Posted in Brainstormers, Down Write Funny, funny, Goals, humor, Little Goals, Mitt Romney, NaNoWriMo, Sarah Palin, spawn, Squirrel!, Vote, whoopie, writing | 10 Comments

A Down “Write” Funny “Iron Uterus” Halloween Story

Meet my alter-ego – The Iron Uterus. Enjoy this post from the past as my Halloween Treat to you! In third grade, while all the other kids wore their store-bought, lead-based painted mask and tissue-thin plastic tunics with superhero abs … Continue reading

Posted in #proudmama, Down Write Funny, funny, Halloween, humor, Iron Uterus, jilted bride, parenting, spawn, Trick or Treat, writing | 9 Comments

Battling the Death Cough

Heyla Friends, I see you’ve all been visiting and it gives me a gigantic thrill in my eager newbie blogger heart to see you here, but then realization of my-porch-light-is-out-so-no-treats-for-you guilt stomps all the fun out of it. I’m sorry! I suffer from the most … Continue reading

Posted in Death Cough, Down Write Funny, funny, humor, illness, NaNoWriMo, writing | 3 Comments

Down “Write” Funny – Caught Naked and Nothing to Write With

I come up with the best lines when I’m naked in the bathroom. Or at 2:46 a. m., when I’m in that half-fuzzed twilight between awareness and psychedelic sub-consciousness. Neither situation is conducive to preserving the brainstorm brilliance to text … Continue reading

Posted in Down Write Funny, funny, humor, naked, NaNoWriMo, Rule of 20, smart phone, spawn, Squirrel!, technology, writing | 11 Comments